Too many of you say that men do not really want a nice gal. You firmly believe from your bad experiences that most men actually enjoy being treated badly. I can assure you this is not true.
Your words and your actions can have effects on a man that will last him a lifetime. That cruel comment you made about his mother, that day you were so angry you called him out of his name, those times you ignored him for no reason at all, the times you chose not to text or call and decided your friends were more important than he was, the times you didn’t open his car door, or walk him to his front door like a lady, he carries those in his mind. And he carries them over to the next woman.
Men remember every nice thing you do or say in the same way they remember every pitiless thing.
When you are good to a man — even if it ends for whatever reason — he will always remember you. You may never know that, but he will. He will think about the way you made him laugh or the way you dried his tears. He will remember the way he could speak to you for hours. He will remember that you made him feel like a man, that even when he was wrong, you still made him feel like a man. You will be the standard for all of the women in his life that follow. If they can’t compete with you or do better, they become bottom of the barrel. You are the woman whose shoes no one has yet to outshine. Continue to be that woman because there is a man who is going to adore you and appreciate you for everything you are worth.
A man may choose to stay with a woman who treats him badly because he fell in love with her during a time when she was pretending to be pleasant (somewhere in the beginning stages of their relationship). However, he won’t last with a woman who is malicious for the rest of his life. Over time, every mean or hurtful thing that woman does will begin to build up inside of him like boiling water.
That man who was once in love and who once catered to his woman’s every whim will begin to fall out of love. He will become less caring, and less nurturing. His heart will grow colder. She won’t see it, not until it is too late. She is blind and will continue to mistreat him. An ignorant woman will seal her own fate. She will think its okay to treat her man this way. He loves her so he is sure to stay. That woman has no idea that her man has an icy storm brewing inside of his heart. Where love once lived is a heart now torn apart. He loves her so much or so she believes. She knows he will stay, but what she chooses not to see is his mind has already broken away.
So you have an option. Treat your men right or don’t, but when you end up alone and can’t figure out what was the matter just remember that man whose heart you shattered.
You can never take away the words you said. They will live with him until the day he is dead. So watch your words and be kind, not cruel, or you may end up sad and lonely.
There is only so much one heart can handle; only so much one guy can handle before he breaks.
Most men truly do not want much. It isn’t a lot to send him a good morning text. It isn’t a lot to call him on your free time. It isn’t a lot to take him out on dates and spend one on one time with him. It isn’t a lot to watch your mouth. It isn’t a lot to treat him like a man. He will love and adore you for it.
There is a saying that whatever you give a man he will give you ten times more. That saying couldn’t be truer. So if you want to be adored, and spoiled and loved, you must stop being vicious, selfish, and rude.
Nice girls do not finish last. Truly nice girls get the guy in the end. At the end of the day, no matter how much money you make or how many freckles you have, a man looking for real love is going to find his worth, along with a woman who deserves him. Your money will be spent, and your looks are sure to go, but if you have a good heart, love can flourish. So be the nice girl or risk losing your men to women who are far better than you ever could be.
This does not mean that you allow yourselves to be treated badly either, but it means opening your heart to good men. It means being a compromising person. It means being forgiving, and nurturing… the kind of woman who would make a good wife and mother. Do not be a doormat for a man who does not appreciate you; however, if your man loves and adores you, be kind because if you don’t, you will lose him in the end.
*Initial article was on Thought Catalog, “Be A Good Man, Because A Woman Will Never Forget How You Treated Her”
This post is dedicated to all men out there.
Abdillah Zamzuri 