I’m an idealist, an optimist and sometimes, a realist, but in all the things that I do and believe in, I believe that we are all selfish people. We do things not for others, but for ourselves, and if others feel as if they are being appreciated because of what we do, then that’s great for everyone because everyone comes out happy but essentially, we are self-serving people – at least that’s what I believe in.
Earlier this afternoon, a friend of mine send me a text asking me “What do you always practice to love yourself?”
The question, provided me with a lot of information and it had to do with one thing that we all search for in life, HAPPINESS. We all want to happy and we all want to love and to be loved in return. There’s no denying about that but in this time and age, most of us get sucked in to our jobs that we forget the meaning of love and happy.
I don’t think any of us can remember how much love and happiness we were born into.
We were the product of love and happiness (doesn’t matter the situation by which you were conceived, because someone loved doing it and was happy to do it is the reason why you were conceived in the first place). We are the very product of someone or a couple’s love for each other (or sex) and were happy to commit to that act (at that point of time).
For the more religious, we are the product of two individual’s love for God and his commandments to procreate.
So, while we are the product of love and happiness, why do some of us struggle to always be happy and loved?
Well, our environments and experiences play a big part but more importantly, WE are responsible for what we choose to happen to us. We are responsible for how happy or loved we want to be, no one has the authority to do that because they do not have that control over us.
And how do we learn to be happy or to love ourselves enough to not be distracted by what happens around us?
Here are 3 simple steps that you can practice. It’s the same one that I practice.
- Spend time with yourself, for yourself.
Do the things you want for yourself. You don’t need to constantly be around people all the time. I’m a social person but I do appreciate being alone and I do enjoy being alone. Watch movies at the theatres alone. Laugh out loud alone. Get reconnected with your inner self. That’s what’s most important.
- Love yourself first before you learn to love others.
You’ll get to this stage once you’ve spent enough time with yourself. When you know what you love, you’ll learn how to love others the same way you want to be loved. Not everyone may agree with how you choose to love them because they have their own opinion on it but at the very least, you’ll know that the relationship will not work out and you can move on without having to hate the person. For you, it’s just, incompatible. That’s all. No hard feelings.
- Share your love.
There’s only so much love you can keep to yourself. Sharing your love will help others learn to heal and move on with their lives. I’m not asking you to begin planting love seeds everywhere you travel (as much as you’d want to be Don Juan) but walk with a smile on your face, with a skip in your step and with a song in your heart.
There’s no one size fits all remedy to this. Everyone does things differently and experiences things differently but if you’ve never tried this before. Then you probably should.
This was written with Lots of Love